I should be cleaning.

And I mean frenetically, feverishly cleaning.  However, I'm sitting here enjoying a cup of orange yogurt (tastes a bit like an orange julius) and hoping it will give me the energy to be frenetically, feverishly cleaning.  I have so little energy this morning that I ache, like deep-in-the-center-of-my-being ache.  First trimester of pregnancy, how I hate thee.  In fact, with Eliza, it wasn't until about the fifth month that I began to believe anything other than I would be one of those women who loves her children but hates maternity.  After about four or five months, I didn't mind so much, though by the end I was so ready to be done I was ready to do just about anything to go into labor.  Oh, naive fool.

I'm still adjusting to the idea of being a mommy of two.  After all, I really don't have being the mommy-of-one down (as I listen to my eldest scream and cry because she is not being rocked to sleep.  She's got some pipes, this one).  I can barely remember (except when I feel like crap) that I am indeed in the family way again, let alone really take in that there is going to be another little one in the house.  I feel like I've finally reached a place where I can expect to sleep through most of the night, and now I am staring two-hour feedings in the face again.  Do I regret getting pregnant again "so soon"?  No.  We wanted this: I knew our children would be fairly close together form some of the family-planning decisions Nick and I have made (like the fact that we'd like to have four kids, preferably before I'm 40, and that we are leaving it totally up the Lord to decide when these kiddos come).  But it is taking some adjusting to the fact that it will all be starting over again fairly soon.  Is it unrealistic to hope that the next one will be easier?  Or at least that I will know what to do a little bit sooner?  Maybe.

I should get to cleaning.  We're having guests over tonight, and we plan to be at the house in town this afternoon.  Pulling carpet staples from hardwood!  So much fun.  So, it means this house has to be cleaned and dinner prepped before I leave in a few hours.  I don't know if I'm going to make it.  The yogurt hasn't done much for my energy.