Mommy fog

Sometimes, I forget that I went to graduate school.  It seems like a completely different life, like it belongs to someone else.  In the midst of wiping bottoms, wiping noses, wardrobe changes due to blow-outs and spit-up, trying to train toddlers to eat more than just snack food, I've forgotten that I sued to sit around a table and discuss the nature of language and whether it has intrinsic meaning.  Once upon a time, I studied Old English and translated poetry.  I analyzed Victorian literature and wrote short stories.  I taught a handful classes and graded papers.  I thought; I read; I wrote.

I don't necessarily think it's an either/or situation.  I can either be a scholar/thinker/writer, etc. or I can be a mommy.  I don't think motherhood precludes anything I might want to do.  I don't think you can have it all, either; something has to give somewhere.  To do other things may mean giving up a few hours with my children.  Had I really wanted to pursue a career in academia, or even just in education, it would have mean taking a job outside the home; I didn't want that.  However, that doesn't mean that I can't study, read, and even write a bit here and there for my own pleasure if I wanted to.

I forget that sometimes in the fog that surrounds me these days.  Not just the postpartum-I'm-not-sleeping-a-wink fog, but the tendency to get caught up in the never-ending tasks for motherhood.  The diaper changes.  The laundry.  Learning to discipline a toddler effectively.  I forget that once upon a time I loved to study and talk about those things with other people.  (Where can I find those other people??)  I've forgotten that a conversation doesn't have to be about what my kids are doing or learning or refusing to do.

So, after the realization comes the action step, right?  What would be my action step?  To be honest, I'm not sure at this moment.  There are still lots of things I feel like I am so far from  mastering just in the sphere to which I've unintentionally confined myself.  Housekeeping?  Homeschooling?  Where is the time to master those, let alone do something else? 

Still, anyone know of a good (free?) correspondence course for learning Biblical Greek or Hebrew?