At last, at last, I think it might be safe to say that morning sickness has passed! The past three months, practically since we found out we were pregnant, has been dominated by this most odious of pregnancy symptoms: nausea and vomiting. I wish I could say I handled it with grace and stoicism, but there were times I laid on the couch, miserable and certain a face-to-face encounter with our toilet was in my very near future, and gave myself over to tears. The longer it went on, the harder it became to not become dejected with each recurrence. I lost weight, I struggled to be optimistic and good-humored, and despaired of the day when I would feel "normal" again. I was asked a month ago how was marriage and pregnancy, and my honest response was, "Marriage is fantastic. Pregnancy... not so much." Thanks be to God for my loving (and very patient) husband as well as friends and family!
Now, at last, it has been almost two weeks since the last time I was sick and my first two fingers are cramping a little as they unwind. And, finally, I feel I can begin to enjoy pregnancy and the prospect of a baby. With the cessation of sickness has come the advent of baby kicks and bumps. When I first felt it, I thought perhaps it was the baby, but being a new mommy it took me a week of feeling and considering before I finally concluded I was definitely enjoying for the first time my kid moving around in there. It still seems very strange to me that a little person, another human being with personality and talents and detractors and their own thoughts is forming in the depths of my belly. I know that sometime in the future these kicks and taps will not be so comfortable or so welcome, but for now I am enjoying them and what they signify: that my baby is so far healthy and growing and things are progressing as they should.
One thing I've noticed is that the more the fact that we are having a baby becomes solid, the more I am calling the kid "him". When I describe the baby's movements, it's usually "his" or "he's". One morning, for some unknown reason, he decided to jump from down by my bladder to up by my belly button, and when describing this to my husband, I said, "I had to massage him back down into place!" I confess, I begin to think maybe I feel it's a boy. I do NOT stand by this prediction. What do I know? I'm a first-time mommy and pregnant-lady. I still eagerly await the sonogram to tell me what he or she will be. If I'm wrong, I'm wrong, and if I'm right, I'm right, and we'll start to pick out clothes and nursery colors and bedding... We will be very happy if it is a boy and Nick admits he will have more fun picking out boys' toys. But we will be equally happy if we are having a girl and I admit I will be very happy to pick out girls' clothes and putting her hair up in pig-tails and ponytails (because I cannot braid for the life of me)!
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